Have you ever been around a grumbler? Or a person who holds a grudge? It’s not an easy experience.
My grandmother was a wonderful woman, generous to a fault, and servant-minded. However, she could hold a grudge “till the cows came home,” as she would say it. She had her reasons, no doubt, including rejection from some in-laws over mistakes her parents had made.
I could see the harm that not forgiving caused her, even when I was a child. A sister-in-law received the inheritance my grandmother thought should have been hers. She needed my grandmother’s support instead of her condemnation when she later lay helpless in a nursing home.
When I matured to adulthood, I made myself a promise not to repeat her attitude, for my own sake as well as others. In only this way, my grandmother was a great bad example for me not to copy. I didn’t want bitterness to be my master.
It made it easier to forgive others when they acted against me. These opportunities came because of various trials. I had betrayals over boyfriends, a lost position because of a changed job description and my husband’s mistaken trust in a man who turned out to be a conman. God used the lessons learned from these events to bring me closer to Him.
In the latter case, I chose to forgive those involved by an act of my will with God’s help. It wasn’t easy since the results brought us close to bankruptcy. Our marriage which could have been the victim only grew stronger. Testing either makes or breaks relationships, I’ve found. At least this is true when the Lord is in the mix.
Actually, God’s involvement took a much bigger role. All I had to consider regarding forgiveness was the grace that He had shown toward me. While I was still His enemy, He died for my sins willingly, regardless of what they were.
I betrayed him with every missed opportunity to tell someone of the gospel. I went to friends or experts to seek counsel rather than the All Wise One whose job is King of the World. My mistaken trust in the undeserving couldn’t surpass my lack of faith in Him through needless worry and absence of prayer.
Any sin committed against me paled in comparison to those I carried out toward my Savior, in spite of which He continued to forgive me. Therefore, I choose grace, by an act of my will and the Spirit’s assistance. Bitterness is not a place where I want to live.
Dianna
Sharing the Fruit of Maturity
